Negotiating will look good on you. And once you have the experience of asking for more, it will be in your bones and at your service forever.
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The loss of human capital cannot be rectified by replacing existing staff (with their good client relations, institutional knowledge and good team relations) with people who must be trained, brought up to speed on company or client projects and integrated into an existing work force.
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Listen.
We're all somewhat afraid of conflict, at least those of us who are not sociopaths.
Men and women both want their days to pass without having accusations hurled at them, without hearing what a frenemy is saying behind their backs, and without stirring their colleagues or clients to anger.
Women, however, do tend to react to a negotiation challenge somewhat more fearful of an angry response than do men.
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We want our daughters to be happy and love the work they do. But passion and value don’t have to be mutually exclusive. No matter if your daughter is angling toward Warner Brothers or Ringling Brothers, learning to negotiate a first salary is a skill that will continue to produce benefits across all levels of life far beyond the first negotiation.
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What if you’re now in a job search at say 53? How do you convince the 35-year-old manager you’ll be sitting down with that you are unavoidably perfect? That the double whammy of age (bias) and no advanced degree are non-issues?
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Imagine these two (paraphrased) research statistics being bookends on a young woman’s “bookshelf of life.”
The single biggest predictor of poverty among women is the birth of their first child.
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Putting off having children for 10 years doubles a young woman’s lifetime earnings.
I know deep down you know how valuable you are. You’re smart, you’re fast. You’re well loved. You have degrees and credentials. And experience. You can look back on your career and tick off a passel of accomplishments. You are a store of value and the shelves are stocked full.
So why are you:
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Avoiding conflict, however, can be damaging and deprive us of opportunity. Overcoming conflict requires courage. It takes courage to acknowledge our human fallibility, acknowledge wrongdoings, make amends and reconcile with our fellows.
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